Words to a Friend (Process Poetry Series Book 1)


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Dale enrolled as soon as his family arrived in town; he planned to become a teacher one day. He looked ridiculous with his long limbs and broad, half-moon ears. Girls ignored him; they tended to go for the athletes—the confident, brawny types. He bombed his first competition.


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Not when you are seventeen or eighteen and suffering from an inferiority complex! He practiced obsessively.

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He was elected student-body vice president and was invited to deliver sermons at churches around Warrensburg. He even got his first girlfriend. He travelled across the Midwest, selling home-education courses to ranchers. He had a knack for sales and soon moved on to more lucrative wares, like bacon, soap, and lard. His dream was to join the Chautauqua lecture circuit, an ensemble road show of public intellectuals and storytellers who performed in makeshift tents across America. Their most coveted speaker was William Jennings Bryan, a two-time candidate for president; crowds were wild for his essay on temperance.

His mother believed that only heathens performed on stage. In , he enrolled in the American Academy of Dramatic Arts, considered one of the most prestigious theatre schools in the country, where he learned, among other things, how to imitate a chair. He tried out for various theatre productions but could never land a part.

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He began teaching public-speaking classes at the Y. He developed a reputation as a masterful teacher, and the classes took up more and more of his time.


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He helped salesmen perfect their pitch and businessmen steady their nerves before a big presentation; he taught his students how to summon courage when they were nervous and feign confidence when they were sick with terror. He was heralded as a magician, one who could turn an awkward loaf into a charmer, or coach a wallflower into the spotlight. He had spent his career gigging, cobbling together an income between teaching, lecturing, and writing: he had no knowledge of what it was like to commute to the same office to do the same job day after day and year after year.

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And yet, he became a world-renowned expert in achieving corporate success. After the war, he accepted a job as a business manager for a theatre troupe. While on tour through Europe, he met Lolita Baucaire, a German actress. They married in , and settled in Paris, where they lived on the royalties for his first book, and Dale worked on a novel that he never published.


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They divorced in When he returned to New York in , to resume his public-speaking classes, he changed his last name to Carnegie. He thought the new spelling made his name easier to remember. It was the tail end of the Great Depression, and virtually no one was hiring. He writes that true leaders tread softly. They ask questions and never bark orders; they heap praise upon their employees and never dwell on their mistakes; they are self-effacing and encouraging and never imperious or cruel. They are authoritative but gentle. His book argues that kindness, often considered a liability in the workplace, is actually an asset.

Carnegie had found that men were socialized to think that being brutish and loud was the only way to demonstrate readiness for power. Offices functioned like one perpetual rush session, like laboratories of aggressive showmanship. He argues, instead, that politeness is the most effective tactic for getting ahead. While Carnegie writes about great men, his book is largely intended for their employees.

It is a happy book. Well, I like skeptical people. Carnegie was not the first person to evangelize about the power of optimism. In the mid-eighteen-hundreds, a group of psychologists, philosophers, and religious leaders formed what they called the school of New Thought. Positivity could even heal a cold. Carnegie often cites James in his books and lessons. Two things. First, force yourself to smile. If you are alone, force yourself to whistle or hum a tune or sing. Act as if you were already happy, and that will tend to make you happy.

Finding the Words to Say It: The Healing Power of Poetry

Carnegie believed that our actions dictate our thoughts, that we can train ourselves to be happy, smart, and productive by behaving as if we are. If managers treated their employees as if they were competent, they would become competent. If employees treated their managers as if they were wise and compassionate, they would stop behaving like tyrants. All anyone wants, Carnegie writes, is to feel appreciated.

And yet, he became a world-renowned expert in achieving corporate success. After the war, he accepted a job as a business manager for a theatre troupe. While on tour through Europe, he met Lolita Baucaire, a German actress. They married in , and settled in Paris, where they lived on the royalties for his first book, and Dale worked on a novel that he never published. They divorced in When he returned to New York in , to resume his public-speaking classes, he changed his last name to Carnegie. He thought the new spelling made his name easier to remember.

It was the tail end of the Great Depression, and virtually no one was hiring. He writes that true leaders tread softly. They ask questions and never bark orders; they heap praise upon their employees and never dwell on their mistakes; they are self-effacing and encouraging and never imperious or cruel. They are authoritative but gentle. His book argues that kindness, often considered a liability in the workplace, is actually an asset. Carnegie had found that men were socialized to think that being brutish and loud was the only way to demonstrate readiness for power.

Offices functioned like one perpetual rush session, like laboratories of aggressive showmanship. He argues, instead, that politeness is the most effective tactic for getting ahead. While Carnegie writes about great men, his book is largely intended for their employees. It is a happy book. Well, I like skeptical people. Carnegie was not the first person to evangelize about the power of optimism. In the mid-eighteen-hundreds, a group of psychologists, philosophers, and religious leaders formed what they called the school of New Thought.

Positivity could even heal a cold. Carnegie often cites James in his books and lessons. Two things. First, force yourself to smile.

If you are alone, force yourself to whistle or hum a tune or sing. Act as if you were already happy, and that will tend to make you happy. Carnegie believed that our actions dictate our thoughts, that we can train ourselves to be happy, smart, and productive by behaving as if we are. If managers treated their employees as if they were competent, they would become competent. If employees treated their managers as if they were wise and compassionate, they would stop behaving like tyrants. All anyone wants, Carnegie writes, is to feel appreciated.

The cult of positive thinking has outlived Carnegie. Ruminating and venting, the article finds, have no tangible benefits, but cheerful resilience pays dividends. There is, however, another school of behavioral psychology, which believes too much optimism makes you soft. Gabriele Oettingen, a psychologist at New York University, studied a group of women enrolled in a weight-reduction program and found that it was the pessimists who lost the most weight. By the year , forty per cent of American workers will be freelancers, according to a study conducted by the software company Intuit.

In this new era of heightened individualism, corporations have had to offer new perks and toys—gourmet food, expensive coffee—to instill company camaraderie. Santa Barbara, told the Los Angeles Times. Carnegie treated the employee-employer relationship as a sacred, symbiotic bond. The modern worker of the post-Fordist era has to be easy to work with and open to change.

Some years ago, I wrote an article about ex-convicts trying to start their own businesses and turn their lives around. I forgot it within seconds. I wanted to finish my book and do more overseas reporting. Then we had to make a list of everything we were going to change about ourselves to accomplish those goals.

That was the real goal. We could all be more industrious, more tenacious, more direct. All we had to do was try. We take a look at how felines took over the Internet, our homes, and our lives. Recommended Stories.

Words to a Friend (Process Poetry Series Book 1) Words to a Friend (Process Poetry Series Book 1)
Words to a Friend (Process Poetry Series Book 1) Words to a Friend (Process Poetry Series Book 1)
Words to a Friend (Process Poetry Series Book 1) Words to a Friend (Process Poetry Series Book 1)
Words to a Friend (Process Poetry Series Book 1) Words to a Friend (Process Poetry Series Book 1)
Words to a Friend (Process Poetry Series Book 1) Words to a Friend (Process Poetry Series Book 1)
Words to a Friend (Process Poetry Series Book 1) Words to a Friend (Process Poetry Series Book 1)
Words to a Friend (Process Poetry Series Book 1) Words to a Friend (Process Poetry Series Book 1)
Words to a Friend (Process Poetry Series Book 1) Words to a Friend (Process Poetry Series Book 1)
Words to a Friend (Process Poetry Series Book 1)

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